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Susana's mystery of dayFight for what you want, love for what youve got...no excuses when you let go |
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September 28 RIP Fishypoo...Sept 28,07. 15.35.Rip Fishypoo. Im sorry....so sorry. We love you. I pray god sends you into a wonderful place and that he will take good care of you. You will always be in my heart. Amen....
Love you FP
SJ* August 22 Something i need to take care of...A poem....
 Boys they like to play with things
To see what makes them run,
But when it comes to kissing,
They do it just for fun.
Boys never give their hearts away
They play us girls for fools,
They wait until we give our hearts
And then they play it cool.
You will wonder where he is at night
You will wonder if he's true,
One moment you will be happy,
One moment you will be blue.
If you get a chance to see him
Your heart begins to dance
Your life revolves around him,
There's nothing like romance.
And then it starts to happen,
You worry day and night
You see, my friend, you're losing him
It never turns out right.
Boys are great, though immature
The price you pay is high,
He may seem sweet and gorgeous
But remember, he's a guy.
Don't fall in love with just a boy
That takes a lot of nerve.
You see, my friend, you need a man
To get what you deserve.
So when you think that you're in love,
Be careful if you can
Before you give your heart away
Make sure that he's a man.
Such a true poem. Since this is a blog, and what youre suppose to do in a blog is spurt out your feelings, then i will. If you read this and find info out that you didnt want to, then that is just your fault for reading my page in the first place. Im not trying to be rude but i had a few comments due to that, and i preferably would like to get things straightened out. Thank you ;)
Back to the spurting out feelings. I have a problem i guess you can call it that. I like 4 different guys. Some way more then others...Some in a different way then the others. Its difficult to explain.
The first one (not going to mention any names) i have liked for years. But he doesnt even know i exist, at least i dont think so. Sure ive talked to him plenty of times, and a few times i think he liked me to. But other then that, i dont think he has a clue. He always talks about other girls that he dates and is infatuated with. Then he breaks up with them and is all sad, then gets over it. And that brings me down. I havent talked to him since last school year, and maybe ill never get the chance to again. I dont know whether i should give it up or just wait? I think i should give it up becuz he'll never knowtise me...but who knows.
 The second one i have liked for a few years now. and its complicated then ever. Ive given up plenty of times, but always seem to end up back where i started. He's also with someone else...there is so much to meantion that i dont even want to start. He makes me laugh and happy half the time, the other half he makes me sad. Should i grow up the nerve to finally go away? It wouldnt make a difference to him... I need someone who will fight for me, not let me go.
The third one has also been a few years type thing. But during that time ive always thought of him as a friend. Until up to this year. We joke around and encourage eachother as friends. But i like him more then that. The thing is...he doesnt show his feelings towards me and that confuses the hell out of me. And when i get confused...i back away. It's hard to explain him, he's very nice and sweet but his mind is a mystery to me. Since i dont know how he feels, and i dont know if he feels more for me then friends, or if he'd be faithful, then i dont know what to do.
The fourth is kind of a new sprung. We've been friends for awhile. When he dates someone, i encourage him. And when i date someone, he encourages me. He helps me with my problems, and is sometimes very psyhcic. But i sometimes wonder what would happen if we did get together? Has he even thought of that?
It isnt like i want to be with all of these guys. I like them, and possibilities could pop up. These are the guys that stand out from the rest. The first one i should give up, the second one i should make a real decision for myself, the third i should talk it out with, and the fourth id have to wait. Like i said, i want a guy whom will fight for me and not let me go so easily. My judgement may be off, but only time will tell.
The one thing that ponders on my mind is that there are millions of girls out there...why would they even want to try with me? What makes me so different from the rest? It saddens me when i think of this...
Last weekend i went school shopping on saturday. On sunday i went with my dad and saw the movie 'stardust' in theaters. I thought it wouldnt be very good but it surprisingly was. The commersals doesnt do it justice. Then we went to my grdf house and swam in his pool for 15 min before it downpoured. After that we played rummy for a few hours while betting lottery tickets. It was very fun, but i didnt win any. Sly misters. Now im just spending the rest of the few days in peace before school starts. Dreding it. :P Babysitting dogs...and umm...thats about it. lol. Boring me, i know. I have a few things to go do, so ill talk later maybe. Miss you all! Adios.
July 12 You're way too...I'm so tired that it is unbelievable. But thats what you get for watching Ghost Hunters then going straight to bed. No hours of sleep. Zip, nil. My imagination was going wild. It's quite funny.
Well im finally back on and running. I think im starting to get addicted to sunbathing. Every day i lay out in the sun and get tan, so now im quite tan as you can imagine. I'm also on the eating galore rage. Eating every two hours. I guess its because im so bored. ALso because of something else. Well, thats all for now.
This is a song that i really disliked when it first came out, now its quite catchy, and weird. Listen. It's Sean Kingston with 'Beautiful Girls (suicidal)'.
June 25 Back with info/plansWow, ive had a very very interesting week/weekend that it's crazy. I guess ill start at the beginning.
*First off, i wasnt here most of last week. I guess you could say i 'was shipped' to my sisters on Tuesday porque there was a job/favor asked. I was asked to take care of a baby kitten, and i was delighted. He wouldnt eat, and would just keep crying. I had to feed him every two or less hours with an eye dropper :P Before i left, he was eating out of the bowl and not yelping. He was the most adorable thing though. Black fur and blue eyes. I guess i have a fairly big compassion towards animals.
*When i got back on saturday, i had a few appointments. I watched my cousin's baseball games, spent time with the family, rode a fourwheeler, and made future plans.
*I have alot of good news. First off, the end of this weekend and next week ill be away in North Carolina. Exciting isnt it? The next good news is that im talking to a certain someone and i guess im not quite 'single' anymore. Dont we just love the cell phone? I do.
*This morning i got a voice message on my phone at 4am. At first it sounded like something i didnt want to hear, but then i listened closely. It was....like splashing water with tiny horror voices. It creeped me out so badly ... still does. I saved it, but im afraid to listen to it. It was probabley a prank call but... it sounded so real.
Well, i have a lot more to say but ill stop here. Kiss Kiss! Buenas Dias.
Edit, Wedn june 27, 07: Well, its Sweet Wednesday! By Saturday Night ill be on the 15 hr journey to N.C. A friend told me this "take pride in yourself. In your self worth"....I have to agree with him fully. We all make mistakes, but we learn from our mistakes. We all get beat up with our emotions by someone saying something, and we recover due to awesome friends and ourselves.
I happen to like this song alot. It shows anger and frustration, but actually, it makes me in a really good mood. Dont ask why, it just does. It's Eve 6 with 'think twice'.
Hey you, thanks for visiting my page! You know you love me (my saying). Big hugz to you!
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